If you're over-scheduled or overwhelmed... read on...
HAVE YOU EVER just needed to sit back with a cold one, wipe the sweat from your brow and look at YOUR OWN big picture? Who needs to do a life-audit? (ok not that I can see you but put your hand down…) If you’re like me, there are times when your plate feels a bit too full. There are times when you’re over-scheduled and overwhelmed, even times when you put effort into unhealthy relationships no matter how addicting, or reluctantly accept jobs that truly don’t inspire you. I think for me, the most important thing (and the thing I need to keep reminding myself to remember) is that my biggest priorities don’t actually fit on a to-do list. You can’t organize love. It’s not a project, it’s an adventure. And adventures have ways of taking us to places we never planned to go.
What if we can take the true balance of where we are now (33, married, no kids, a rockin’ but mighty hard and tricky career, quarter-life crisis, too old for the club scene and too young to admit how much I love reading books in bed at 8pm on a saturday night etc.) and combine our new found wisdom of 30+ years with the yang of who we want to be NOW? How about we reinvent ourselves?
I know that I always thought it sounded wild and extravagant, the thought of reinvention, when it is actually pretty simple and just takes a little effort. Some people go on adventurous journeys and some just change certain things that they do or how they react and all of those small changes add up and result in a – voila – reinvented self. I am more excited than ever to share my thoughts on this because it is a topic close to my heart. I hope this post will either bring you comfort in knowing there is someone else like you that is going through these same things, or do something good for your soul – whatever that might be.
I chose to use the phrase “reinvent yourself” because I have recently had a few conversations pertaining to this with my spouse. Lately, it has really started to sink in that after a year (or more) of us talking about what this means, I am realizing in order to live a happier life, this is a change I need to officially make. It is time to reinvent myself – or better yet find myself that is not my 20 year old version or even high-school version, but “me” here and now.
I have always been a control freak and in return I have always had a really hard time “chilling out”. The perfectionist in me doesn’t make the situation any better. I am also guilty of getting so caught up in the lack of routine, that I forget that I always have the opportunity to re-invent myself and re-shape my life at any moment.
What’s currently on your plate? Consider your full-time job, side hustle, relationships, community involvement, social media, and whatever else you spend time on. I wanted to share with you how I plan to take my life back from myself, some of it I already started (see my notes on unhealthy relationships):
Stop caring so much about what others think seriously, stop sweating the small stuff
Don’t let the struggle of finances beat you down Appreciate what you have and don’t dwell on the new “latest and greatest”
Live a more minimalist lifestyle
Get involved in more spiritual learning
Break-free of toxic relationships
Travel, whether its around the world or in your state
Pick-up hobbies you actually care about
Be more spontaneous and adventurous
Reach out to old friends/current friends and keep in better contact
Stay connected to family
Spend more quality time with spouse/friends/family
Put away technology and have real conversations
These are just some of the things that come to mind when I think about the things I want to change/improve upon for myself. I think that we all struggle in a sense. Struggle to be a good friend, a good spouse, a good family member, a good worker, a good member of society – the list goes on and on. Let’s face it, we put a lot of pressure on ourselves to make others happy or to at least complete our necessary daily tasks to keep things moving along in life (see my note on present over perfect).
What I am beginning to realize is, when we stop focusing on what we should do, how we should act, or pretty much trying to please “society”, we set ourselves free of all of the pressure we put on our shoulders each day.
Now, I am not saying that I believe everyone should abandon all of their responsibilities, morals, etc. and throw all caution to the wind; but, I do think that once we realize that this “societal pressure” to be a certain way or live a certain life, is something that we don’t necessarily have to live our lives by, we become free to be the people we truly want to be.