AN UNCONVENTIONAL APPROACH TO A NEW YEAR
Its that time of year! And not just a new year but the dawn of a new decade is upon us. Whats in order for you? Lose weight (again)? Change jobs (again)? Find love (again)? Why not take a very unconventional approach to the next chapter in your life and DON’T make any resolutions!
Every year, since I can remember finding the “self help” section at my local Barns and Noble, I have emptily promised myself to lose the weight that aviation so unforgivably gave me as a very unwanted Christmas gift. I find myself yearning to shed the “sailor mouth”, again, thank you aviation, and I try my gosh-darnedest to kick the gross nail biting habit that has haunted me since I grew my first chompers as a wee lass.
At the end of a very hard 2018, I was fed up. Almost 40 pounds overweight, over worked contracting in aviation, brought on only by my own hand, and going through the daily motions of my relationships feeling empty and unfulfilled. Anyone massively nodding in agreement? I knew if I didn’t make changes, and fast, my 30’s were going to be hell.
If you don’t want to end up doing the same thing you always do (setting unrealistic goals and forgetting about them come week 2 in January), throw out the societal norm and DO NOTHING! I mean it, dont set a single resolution and instead just BE PRESENT! “But Aubrey, I’m a planner and I NEED A GOAL” - well my friend, then set a goal to set no goals! Get creative.
DON'T MAKE ANY New Years RESOLUTIONS
I took on this mindset for one full year in 2019 and the genuine changes I made, changed. my. life. forever. Heres what happened:
Come January 1 of this past year, I woke up with the usual fuzzy head from champagne toasts at midnight and I didn’t let Lady Guilt creep in. Instead I was present, and I thanked God for the wonderful time and celebration of friends the night before. It actually felt pretty good knowing I didn’t have to rush to the gym (that I wouldn’t end up at, a week from then). My husband noticed this and immediately got on board.
BE PRESENT AND SAY 'NO'
Next, I decided, in order to be present, I had to BE PRESENT. Which meant shedding a massive amount of work load. Saying NO means NEXT OPPORTUNITY. I began declining work trips that did not feel right or good. For me this means not taking the 3am departure trips and declining trips that overlapped some events I normally miss in my personal life. I panicked at first because I knew if I didn’t fly, then I didn’t make money err go my bills would not be paid. HOWEVER; It actually worked out! The fear of the unknown stressed me out but once I began being actually present at my job, enjoyment was restored and I was already sleeping better.
Sleeping better led to me craving time to exercise, which then pushed me to not compromise my hard work with bad food and I began meal prepping, so nutritional education came next. From there I was FEELING and SLEEPING so much better! The domino effect was in full swing. My newly developing body gave me confidence in my clothes again, which helped me hold my head higher at work and my friends wanted to be around me more. (I will keep it personal but lets just say, even my 8th year with Blaine felt like it was my first, butterflies everywhere!)
FULL STEAM AHEAD
By May, my life looked so different compared to previous years. I had my confidence back and I had ME back. A better version of myself than I could ever imagine. Now that I was balanced and back in action, I continued to be present and let the dominos fall where they may. I locked in on stable, good paying clients because I was providing quality services, I continued my health journey, I launched this very website and the list goes on!
In conclusion, break the resolution cycle which only perpetuates feelings of failure and inadquacy creating the counter productivity you have known so well from your past "resolutions".
Consider for a moment why you haven't shifted that weight, changed that job, worked on your dream hobby, or found “the one”. Maybe you didn't really want to, or maybe you were busy prioritizing things that don't bring the soul-fulfilling contentment to your life that you internally seek.
It doesn’t matter how many books you find in the “self help” section, the moment you stop pressuring yourself to take on resolutions, is the moment you allow yourself to breathe and giving yourself grace to do so is key. Be present and allow yourself the time and clarity to let your thoughts flow naturally without that pressure. That breathing space allows us to see who it is that has been doing all the doing, who it is who has been trying to reach all these goals and get to these moments of self-actualisation that never seem to quite plug the hole of fulfillment.
New Year or not, once we turn the search inwards and start truly understanding the “self”, the pilot (you) flying the plane (life), we aren't just given a chance to take off (start again); it's more than that. We are reborn, and most importantly, set free. This is the feeling a New Year should bring. A feeling of release, of newness, of being free.
Clean your slate from last year and ban the new years resolution!
TIPS FOR A RESOLUTION FREE
- Ban the resolution by making zero promises to yourself before the clock strikes midnight
- Instead, BE PRESENT in everything you do
-Saying "NO" simply means "Next Opportunity"
- Listen to your body and oblige to what it needs
- Let the domino effect take hold to wherever your heart is taking you
- Get creative and stay in an optimistic mindset. Where the mind goes the man follows
- Give yourself GRACE! If you fall, be kind to yourself and get back up
New Years House Party Staples
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Aubreys Favorite New Year Recipes
MILE HIGH BOOK CLUB
BOOK OF THE MONTH